Dear Friends,
Driving down from Flagstaff to Sedona, AZ, I passed through a colorful forest corridor surrounded by sheer stone mountains. Truly a natural wonder. Sedona is considered one of the most spiritual towns in the US. It is built upon red rock that has an uplifting vibration itself. Many of the stores sell products and services designed to uplifts one's consciousness.
I arrived at the Ashram of Awakening, and Swami Steve and Solar greeted me cordially. I set up Swamiji's picture with a vase of flowers and then sat down to meditate with several others. Every weekday in the evening, Swami Steve invites people to the Ashram to meditate for at least an hour. The doors are open to everyone. After a beautiful satsang, chanting the Perennial Mantra, Hare Krishna, Swami Steve took me to a diner for dinner and told me about his ego dissolution and recreation of the personality. If there is no ego, then whose voice speaks? Swami Steve spoke with enthusiasm and animation, and I felt at ease in his friendly presence. As I did not have a place to stay, he called Cynthia to see if she could house me. She graciously provided me with a comfortable room and bed.
That night, I met Cynthia, a gentle and kind being who welcomed me into her home. It was full of crystals - her good friends. We went to a crystal shop and crystal bowl shop where we had the opportunity to enjoy the healing energy. Each crystal bowl, beautifully crafted with fine stone, had a tone that resonated with a particular chakra and had a particular healing quality. The sound was angelic and deeply healing.
Every day, I went to the Ashram of Awakening to meditate with Swami Steve. He took me in as a student. We spoke about the path to Enlightenment. One morning, as he was speaking to me, my left ear started to ring with an electric current. "Keep your attention on this sound," he said. "This is the key to deeper states of awakening." He continued, "Place your awareness on the navel in the center of the abdomen and feel the Presence. Notice that when you are in this space, you won't feel the wind." Swami Steve spent hours every day helping me to deepen my awareness. My meditation deepened, and my ability to sit in silence for long periods of time increased. I treasure the moments spent with Swami Steve.
One night, I had a satsang planned at the ChocolaTree, a restaurant dedicated to raising the consciousness of people. I asked the hostess where I would be sitting and she guided me to the Shivalingam, a large stone right near the main register and main pathway of the servers. I spread out my yoga mat and looked out at all the people who were eating their food and chatting. This was not what I had expected. Who would want to connect to the spiritual energy or listen to dharma talk while eating lovely food? Who tastes the depths of the soul while enjoying the taste of chocolate? I accepted these circumstances in the midst of the bustling room of the restauant. As I began to play the harmonium, a young man walked up and placed a dollar in front of me along with a note:
"Your harmonium blossoms exquisite joy into being, as you let your heart sing into the devotion of the one. The Universe thunders in your divine beauty. Do you see who you are? A creator god in a body of light, a temple of pure joy. A divine lover of the spaces between the spaces. You have become One."
Who was this mysterious young man who wandered the world? Who am I? The entire room was captured for a moment. "Let us chant 3 OM's together" I said, and everyone chanted in unison. After this magical moment, everyone went back to their eating and chatting, and I sang my heart out, surrendering to the Energy of the sound that vibrates through eternity.
The last day in Sedona, I arrived at the Ashram to say goodbye. Manna, Solar and Swami Steve were there. They wanted me to play and sing music with the harmonium. So I played in honor of Swamiji. The sweet music filled the room. We took pictures together, particularly inspired by Solar who reminded me of Santa Claus. Solar is deeply aware the Self and is a mostly silent guide for my own path. He gave me a blessing and then I set out on my way. Such deep gratitude and love I feel for all the beings at the Ashram.
Always at Thy Feet,
Brian
Wednesday, December 11, 2013
Sunday, November 24, 2013
The path begins with "yes"
Dear Friends,
Arriving in New Orleans, I went straight to Swan River Community Center, a donation-only yoga center led by Haiyan, to hold satsang. Then Haiyan and I drove to his home where I stayed for a week. As we entered the neighborhood, he said that some people call this part of New Orleans "the hood." Well, I love the hood. Haiyan and his family welcomed me with love and kindness.
Another day, we walked through the hood. Haiyan would greet his various neighbors on the way who sat on the front porch socializing. We reached a large garden where Meredith was tending to the plants and picking vegetables. Haiyan picked a harmless looking pepper and said, "Take a bite." So I bit into it and my nose almost caught on fire and my head nearly exploded. The burning continued for a few hours as Meredith, Haiyan, and I walked through the French quarter all the way to the Mississippi River. There we sat on a bench and a flamboyant man approached us.
"Nice shoes," he said, addressing me. "Let me tell you about life." And then he gave me a satsang about the deep lessons of life. I sat there with a sort of stunned look. Had I asked for this? He certainly was delighted to have a captivated audience as he spoke his poetic words and then walked off.
That evening, Meredith took us to a meditation and potluck. We climbed up on the roof overlooking the the neighborhood at night. Meredith's kundalini teacher led the meditation. "Say the mantra, Sa Re Ga Ma Pa Da Ni SaTaNaMA So Say etc in one deep breath, singing it over 2 octaves. I will time it for one hour and two minutes. Let's go!" Oh boy, if I had known what this entailed, I would have skipped the meditation. My voice could not reach the low notes nor the high notes. I breathed so much that my rib started to hurt again. That rib muscle had hurt for months after a prolonged sickness and coughing.
The first 40 minutes of the meditation, I wondered when it was going to end. It seemed much longer than an hour and 2 minutes. The last 22 minutes of the meditation, I suddenly crossed over a barrier and felt renewed. The rest of the meditation was easy. As we completed, I burst out laughing and the laughter peeled across the town below. This madness went on for a few minutes, and then my mind plunged into deep meditation. Some time later, we climbed back down to the kitchen and ate our feast. It was a lovely time.
As I cross over my perceived limits, I realize new possibilities, and the fears and struggles of life dissolve. The ultimate path of Spirit is going beyond all limits. And the path starts with one step...yes.
With love,
Brian
Arriving in New Orleans, I went straight to Swan River Community Center, a donation-only yoga center led by Haiyan, to hold satsang. Then Haiyan and I drove to his home where I stayed for a week. As we entered the neighborhood, he said that some people call this part of New Orleans "the hood." Well, I love the hood. Haiyan and his family welcomed me with love and kindness.
Another day, we walked through the hood. Haiyan would greet his various neighbors on the way who sat on the front porch socializing. We reached a large garden where Meredith was tending to the plants and picking vegetables. Haiyan picked a harmless looking pepper and said, "Take a bite." So I bit into it and my nose almost caught on fire and my head nearly exploded. The burning continued for a few hours as Meredith, Haiyan, and I walked through the French quarter all the way to the Mississippi River. There we sat on a bench and a flamboyant man approached us.
"Nice shoes," he said, addressing me. "Let me tell you about life." And then he gave me a satsang about the deep lessons of life. I sat there with a sort of stunned look. Had I asked for this? He certainly was delighted to have a captivated audience as he spoke his poetic words and then walked off.
That evening, Meredith took us to a meditation and potluck. We climbed up on the roof overlooking the the neighborhood at night. Meredith's kundalini teacher led the meditation. "Say the mantra, Sa Re Ga Ma Pa Da Ni SaTaNaMA So Say etc in one deep breath, singing it over 2 octaves. I will time it for one hour and two minutes. Let's go!" Oh boy, if I had known what this entailed, I would have skipped the meditation. My voice could not reach the low notes nor the high notes. I breathed so much that my rib started to hurt again. That rib muscle had hurt for months after a prolonged sickness and coughing.
The first 40 minutes of the meditation, I wondered when it was going to end. It seemed much longer than an hour and 2 minutes. The last 22 minutes of the meditation, I suddenly crossed over a barrier and felt renewed. The rest of the meditation was easy. As we completed, I burst out laughing and the laughter peeled across the town below. This madness went on for a few minutes, and then my mind plunged into deep meditation. Some time later, we climbed back down to the kitchen and ate our feast. It was a lovely time.
As I cross over my perceived limits, I realize new possibilities, and the fears and struggles of life dissolve. The ultimate path of Spirit is going beyond all limits. And the path starts with one step...yes.
With love,
Brian
Saturday, November 23, 2013
A great friend
Dear Friends,
In St. Louis, I visited a holy place called Living Insights. Jack takes care of this rare place of pilgrimage. The primary relic is a large life-size statue of St. Therese of Lisieux which hundreds of people come to visit to ask for blessings. And indeed, hundreds of miracles are reported out of these prayers. The energy at Living Insights is so strong that I experienced deep meditation and healing just walking through the door. There are statues and pictures of many saints, bodhisattvas, gods, and goddesses from many spiritual and religious traditions.
I joined Jack in one of his morning rituals. We walked around the many rooms, lighting candles in front of the statues, chanting holy mantras, praying for the world, and honoring all the great saints and deities. There are sections representing Hinduism, Christianity, Islam, Judaism, Native American, Buddhism, and many more traditions. There are also crystal singing bowls that Jack plays, stunning the mind into deeper meditation. In the smallest room, we sat amidst hundreds of highly blessed crystals, pictures, statues, and other rare objects that heal the mind, body, and soul. Chanting "Om Namah Shivaya" 108 times, my mind settled into a state of deep peace, communing with the power of Shiva.
Jack has given his life and resources to keep Living Insights alive. He welcomes each person with love and friendship. His manner is kindly - always in service. Many are attracted to Living Insights just to be with him. There is no fee for coming to visit. People may donate to support the cause. Jack has dedicated his life to nurturing this sacred space. Every morning he honors the deities, thus bringing their presence alive so powerfully in each room. People have given Living Insights so many rare relics that many of them are hidden behind each other. I am touched by Jack's offering to the world. May many more people have the opportunity to visit Jack and this holy temple.
In gratitude for Jack, a great friend...
Brian
In St. Louis, I visited a holy place called Living Insights. Jack takes care of this rare place of pilgrimage. The primary relic is a large life-size statue of St. Therese of Lisieux which hundreds of people come to visit to ask for blessings. And indeed, hundreds of miracles are reported out of these prayers. The energy at Living Insights is so strong that I experienced deep meditation and healing just walking through the door. There are statues and pictures of many saints, bodhisattvas, gods, and goddesses from many spiritual and religious traditions.
I joined Jack in one of his morning rituals. We walked around the many rooms, lighting candles in front of the statues, chanting holy mantras, praying for the world, and honoring all the great saints and deities. There are sections representing Hinduism, Christianity, Islam, Judaism, Native American, Buddhism, and many more traditions. There are also crystal singing bowls that Jack plays, stunning the mind into deeper meditation. In the smallest room, we sat amidst hundreds of highly blessed crystals, pictures, statues, and other rare objects that heal the mind, body, and soul. Chanting "Om Namah Shivaya" 108 times, my mind settled into a state of deep peace, communing with the power of Shiva.
Jack has given his life and resources to keep Living Insights alive. He welcomes each person with love and friendship. His manner is kindly - always in service. Many are attracted to Living Insights just to be with him. There is no fee for coming to visit. People may donate to support the cause. Jack has dedicated his life to nurturing this sacred space. Every morning he honors the deities, thus bringing their presence alive so powerfully in each room. People have given Living Insights so many rare relics that many of them are hidden behind each other. I am touched by Jack's offering to the world. May many more people have the opportunity to visit Jack and this holy temple.
In gratitude for Jack, a great friend...
Brian
Tuesday, October 8, 2013
Every Body in the fire
Dear Friends,
On Sunday, at the invitation of a wonderful friend in St. Louis named Barbara, I attended a purification lodge also known as a sweat lodge. It is an old Native American tradition in which people sit together inside a tent structure, sweating in the heat from the rocks in the middle. The inside is in complete blackness.
Everyone submits prayers and songs in honor of the divine. As the sweat pours out of the body, we are purified together. The physical nature of the environment is quite intense. Many times, I wondered if I would leave the lodge. My mind focused mostly on the physical discomfort, but the singing and prayer were very helpful in keeping the mind more focused on the spiritual purpose. By the end of the 3rd round, I was lying on the ground where the air was coolest, shouting out some of the songs. The purification lodge is such a beautiful place to send the positive energy of prayer out into the world. The lodgers were so loving and compassionate. I was happy to be with them and share in such an amazing experience.
My mind interpreted the lodge as an austerity - a choice to go beyond the comfort zone of the ego. By breaking through my comfort zone, I feel more comfortable in a wider variety of experiences. I don't resist life so much because I have gone through the fire. This is part of the spiritual path. When even difficult physical experiences do not bring the mind to body consciousness, I feel great progress.
May all beings be blessed with the challenges of life.
Warmly,
Brian
Friday, September 20, 2013
Insecurity
Dear Friends,
Recently I was speaking to a woman about why "bad" things happen to people. I said that the world revolves around karma. If you have done good, good will come to you. If you have done bad, bad will come to you. Her voice started to rise. "Well, what about the girl who is put into a prostitution situation when she is very young. Do you believe she deserves it?" "Well," I said, "in this case it would be best to bring compassion to the situation." "But you believe in karma," she said. "I'm not interested in arguing about it. In this situation, it would be nice to bring compassion and let go of the karma idea right now."
I found the feeling of insecurity and fear coming up in my being. I wanted her approval and found that I was striving to get that approval the entire time I was visiting her. Even just a warm nod or the word "yes." Approval would somehow fill a void inside that said, "Maybe I'm wrong and I don't know what I'm talking about. I really want to hear approval from the outside world. Then I'll be whole and complete. If she likes me, I can like myself." Why did I want to convince her? Because I want to feel right. I want agreement. Then it would alleviate the feeling inside that says, "I'm wrong. I'm scared if others discover that."
I also fear "attack." If someone reprimands me for what I've said, I feel like I've been a "bad boy." So I spend time always trying to appease the one who does not approve. I never talk back. In fact, my being usually shuts down and shirks in the face of "attack."
I am very happy to meet this woman. If I surrounded myself with people who always agreed with what I said, these deeper feelings of insecurity and fear would never come to the surface to release. So she became the key to unlock a deeper part of the mind that I would need to see sooner or later.
Oh Lord, please bring these challenges to me so that I may face my fears and insecurities. Otherwise, I will not be able to see You clearly. Oh Lord, I am ready to face my deepest darkness. Thank you for your Grace.
With love,
Brian
Recently I was speaking to a woman about why "bad" things happen to people. I said that the world revolves around karma. If you have done good, good will come to you. If you have done bad, bad will come to you. Her voice started to rise. "Well, what about the girl who is put into a prostitution situation when she is very young. Do you believe she deserves it?" "Well," I said, "in this case it would be best to bring compassion to the situation." "But you believe in karma," she said. "I'm not interested in arguing about it. In this situation, it would be nice to bring compassion and let go of the karma idea right now."
I found the feeling of insecurity and fear coming up in my being. I wanted her approval and found that I was striving to get that approval the entire time I was visiting her. Even just a warm nod or the word "yes." Approval would somehow fill a void inside that said, "Maybe I'm wrong and I don't know what I'm talking about. I really want to hear approval from the outside world. Then I'll be whole and complete. If she likes me, I can like myself." Why did I want to convince her? Because I want to feel right. I want agreement. Then it would alleviate the feeling inside that says, "I'm wrong. I'm scared if others discover that."
I also fear "attack." If someone reprimands me for what I've said, I feel like I've been a "bad boy." So I spend time always trying to appease the one who does not approve. I never talk back. In fact, my being usually shuts down and shirks in the face of "attack."
I am very happy to meet this woman. If I surrounded myself with people who always agreed with what I said, these deeper feelings of insecurity and fear would never come to the surface to release. So she became the key to unlock a deeper part of the mind that I would need to see sooner or later.
Oh Lord, please bring these challenges to me so that I may face my fears and insecurities. Otherwise, I will not be able to see You clearly. Oh Lord, I am ready to face my deepest darkness. Thank you for your Grace.
With love,
Brian
Sunday, September 15, 2013
Bowing in humility
Dear Friends,
Yesterday Uncle Ted, Aunt Madolyn, cousin Lizzie, and I picked apples from the trees in an orchard. Many of the trees bowed low to give the fruit. This is the spirit of Mother Earth. Humbly she bows in service to the humans and gives in abundance. That is why some people worship Her. She is the one who provides everything that the body is made of. How can we give back to Her? She has given so much.
In the even, I traveled 2 hours north to Port Huron with Kailash, Krishnamoyi, and Atmaram to hold a kirtan at a retreat. I was planning to watch, but Atmaram asked me to sit with them and lead 2 songs. That was a surprise, and I was very happy to serve. The Energy was beautiful, and the people were so appreciative of the event.
As we headed back, we were eating the apples that had been picked that morning. Aunt Madolyn had suggested I bring some of this delightful fruit. Atmaram explained the benefits of sharing kirtan - chanting of the Holy Names of God. Ask others to join in the music and practice together. Each person who joins in the practice becomes a servant of the Lord and also has the opportunity to immerse him or herself into the Energy. Then the music is not so much focused on a one person performance, but rather a community coming together to share in the Communion. Yes, each person is an aspect of the Divine. No one is higher or lower. The mind believes in separation.
There is only One Being...infinite...whole...complete... Thank you, Swamiji!
With love,
Brian
Yesterday Uncle Ted, Aunt Madolyn, cousin Lizzie, and I picked apples from the trees in an orchard. Many of the trees bowed low to give the fruit. This is the spirit of Mother Earth. Humbly she bows in service to the humans and gives in abundance. That is why some people worship Her. She is the one who provides everything that the body is made of. How can we give back to Her? She has given so much.
In the even, I traveled 2 hours north to Port Huron with Kailash, Krishnamoyi, and Atmaram to hold a kirtan at a retreat. I was planning to watch, but Atmaram asked me to sit with them and lead 2 songs. That was a surprise, and I was very happy to serve. The Energy was beautiful, and the people were so appreciative of the event.
As we headed back, we were eating the apples that had been picked that morning. Aunt Madolyn had suggested I bring some of this delightful fruit. Atmaram explained the benefits of sharing kirtan - chanting of the Holy Names of God. Ask others to join in the music and practice together. Each person who joins in the practice becomes a servant of the Lord and also has the opportunity to immerse him or herself into the Energy. Then the music is not so much focused on a one person performance, but rather a community coming together to share in the Communion. Yes, each person is an aspect of the Divine. No one is higher or lower. The mind believes in separation.
There is only One Being...infinite...whole...complete... Thank you, Swamiji!
With love,
Brian
Monday, September 9, 2013
The panic button
Dear Friends,
Two nights ago, I arrived at my uncle's and aunt's home very early in the morning. Uncle Ted had promised open the door after I had rung the doorbell. So I brought my bags up to the front door and rang the bell. No one came. No lights. Just silence. I pressed the button again and used the knocker. No response. Wondering and waiting for a while, I walked back to the van and fell asleep inside.
Then waking up, I went to the front door again and rang the bell. No response. Going back to the van, I crawled inside and accidentally pressed the Panic button on the keyring. The van started to honk loudly and repeatedly in the dead of the night. I dropped the key in the darkness and started to grope on the floor. Finally, I pressed the button again and the sound stopped. I froze on the floor of the car, wondering if anyone would come out to see what was happening. I remember the last time I was here a year ago. A neighbor was suspicious of a person in black hoodie doing yoga on the grass in the backyard and had called my uncle to report the suspicious activity. Now I was afraid... "not again." Here is the blog from a year ago: http://wanderfortruth.blogspot.com/2012/09/yogi-in-black-hoodie.html
So I crouched for a while between the seats, watching for neighbors' shadows in the dark and listening for the sound of police sirens. No one appeared. So I crawled to the back and lay in bed until my uncle finally came out to get me. It was 3am. He had been in a deep sleep and had not heard a sound of the drama that had unfolded outside his door.
Someone in my being, I have a strong fear of being embarrassed or humiliated. Why? Well, when I was young, I went through the same sorts of events and they made a deep impression on the psyche. Perhaps it is good to be embarrassed once a while...to find out, "What am I scared of?"
With love,
Brian
Two nights ago, I arrived at my uncle's and aunt's home very early in the morning. Uncle Ted had promised open the door after I had rung the doorbell. So I brought my bags up to the front door and rang the bell. No one came. No lights. Just silence. I pressed the button again and used the knocker. No response. Wondering and waiting for a while, I walked back to the van and fell asleep inside.
Then waking up, I went to the front door again and rang the bell. No response. Going back to the van, I crawled inside and accidentally pressed the Panic button on the keyring. The van started to honk loudly and repeatedly in the dead of the night. I dropped the key in the darkness and started to grope on the floor. Finally, I pressed the button again and the sound stopped. I froze on the floor of the car, wondering if anyone would come out to see what was happening. I remember the last time I was here a year ago. A neighbor was suspicious of a person in black hoodie doing yoga on the grass in the backyard and had called my uncle to report the suspicious activity. Now I was afraid... "not again." Here is the blog from a year ago: http://wanderfortruth.blogspot.com/2012/09/yogi-in-black-hoodie.html
So I crouched for a while between the seats, watching for neighbors' shadows in the dark and listening for the sound of police sirens. No one appeared. So I crawled to the back and lay in bed until my uncle finally came out to get me. It was 3am. He had been in a deep sleep and had not heard a sound of the drama that had unfolded outside his door.
Someone in my being, I have a strong fear of being embarrassed or humiliated. Why? Well, when I was young, I went through the same sorts of events and they made a deep impression on the psyche. Perhaps it is good to be embarrassed once a while...to find out, "What am I scared of?"
With love,
Brian
Monday, July 29, 2013
Divine Mother
Dear Friend,
The Divine Mother is the power of Creation itself. She is the Ultimate Intelligence that holds Creation together. She is the Love, Joy and Abundance of the Cosmos. We can install Her in our Heart by worshiping her. Chanting mantras to Her. Treating every one and thing as Her. Expressing our love for Her through acts of kindness and service. Just recognizing Her Power and Benevolence. The more we attune to the Creative Force of the universe, the more this Energy flows through every aspect of our being. It transforms all our thought and actions, so that we are in complete service to Her Power. She runs the life, and we are delighted to surrender at Her Feet.
As Swamiji is the Divine Mother, I am constantly focused on His Energy. The more I am attuned to Him, the more powerfully the Energy runs through my heart - like the Ganges River. It creates such Love and Joy that I naturally want to share It with others. Indeed, there is nothing I would rather do. Nothing compares to It. I feel like shouting It from the highest mountain. I cry at night because of It. It overwhelms my being.
Satsang is a chance for all of us to connect to Him and bring the Divine Mother into our lives more fully and completely. So when we are doing our daily tasks, instead of seeing separate things, we see the Grace of the Divine Mother blessing us around every corner. We cannot escape Her.
Oh Holy Mother, you are my very soul, you are my life, my mind, and my body. Please run this life as You desire. I cannot claim anything as my own. You are the only One.
With love,
Brian
www.ustream.tv/recorded/36533693
The Divine Mother is the power of Creation itself. She is the Ultimate Intelligence that holds Creation together. She is the Love, Joy and Abundance of the Cosmos. We can install Her in our Heart by worshiping her. Chanting mantras to Her. Treating every one and thing as Her. Expressing our love for Her through acts of kindness and service. Just recognizing Her Power and Benevolence. The more we attune to the Creative Force of the universe, the more this Energy flows through every aspect of our being. It transforms all our thought and actions, so that we are in complete service to Her Power. She runs the life, and we are delighted to surrender at Her Feet.
As Swamiji is the Divine Mother, I am constantly focused on His Energy. The more I am attuned to Him, the more powerfully the Energy runs through my heart - like the Ganges River. It creates such Love and Joy that I naturally want to share It with others. Indeed, there is nothing I would rather do. Nothing compares to It. I feel like shouting It from the highest mountain. I cry at night because of It. It overwhelms my being.
Satsang is a chance for all of us to connect to Him and bring the Divine Mother into our lives more fully and completely. So when we are doing our daily tasks, instead of seeing separate things, we see the Grace of the Divine Mother blessing us around every corner. We cannot escape Her.
Oh Holy Mother, you are my very soul, you are my life, my mind, and my body. Please run this life as You desire. I cannot claim anything as my own. You are the only One.
With love,
Brian
www.ustream.tv/recorded/36533693
Saturday, July 20, 2013
Whispering satsang
Dear Friends,
Yesterday I woke up with a sore throat. Gradually the voice grew more hoarse until it virtually disappeared in the evening. I had planned 2 satsangs that evening. One of them, I played the harmonium during an asana class. I cancelled the other one since we had planned to sing kirtan. Who wants to listen to the sound of silence? Not many.
This morning, I had a satsang online. So like the great Yogi, Baba Hari Dass, I wrote down words on a piece of paper to communicate with people. Unlike him, I whispered the mantras in the the microphone. Not certain if anyone online heard a word of it. But it appeared that John, my roommate, enjoyed it. It is interesting to note how much I wanted to speak. What would I do as a silent yogi? Whispering satsangs are fun...but I have doubts about whether anyone would want to sit with the "silent sadhu." Maybe when I can happily be in silence all the time, others will be happy to sit with me.
With love,
Brian
Yesterday I woke up with a sore throat. Gradually the voice grew more hoarse until it virtually disappeared in the evening. I had planned 2 satsangs that evening. One of them, I played the harmonium during an asana class. I cancelled the other one since we had planned to sing kirtan. Who wants to listen to the sound of silence? Not many.
This morning, I had a satsang online. So like the great Yogi, Baba Hari Dass, I wrote down words on a piece of paper to communicate with people. Unlike him, I whispered the mantras in the the microphone. Not certain if anyone online heard a word of it. But it appeared that John, my roommate, enjoyed it. It is interesting to note how much I wanted to speak. What would I do as a silent yogi? Whispering satsangs are fun...but I have doubts about whether anyone would want to sit with the "silent sadhu." Maybe when I can happily be in silence all the time, others will be happy to sit with me.
With love,
Brian
Sunday, July 14, 2013
Joy of Kirtan
Dear Friends,
Yesterday I went to see David Newman in the Dallas area. He is a wandering minstrel, playing uplifting spiritual music around the world. His music is loving and sweet, and the Energy is blissful and joyous. He plays music for the love of Neem Karoli Baba, a great Saint of the 20th century. I am so thankful to join in his his kirtan. Kirtan is an opportunity to commune with one's Divine Essence through music. Everyone joins together on a beautiful ride into the Spiritual Heart, chanting the holy name of God. As David says, each chant means, "Thank you, God, I love you, God."
Here is a link to a song that represents what David brings to the world.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0p2Dx9TsKX8&feature=youtu.be
With love,
Brian
Yesterday I went to see David Newman in the Dallas area. He is a wandering minstrel, playing uplifting spiritual music around the world. His music is loving and sweet, and the Energy is blissful and joyous. He plays music for the love of Neem Karoli Baba, a great Saint of the 20th century. I am so thankful to join in his his kirtan. Kirtan is an opportunity to commune with one's Divine Essence through music. Everyone joins together on a beautiful ride into the Spiritual Heart, chanting the holy name of God. As David says, each chant means, "Thank you, God, I love you, God."
Here is a link to a song that represents what David brings to the world.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0p2Dx9TsKX8&feature=youtu.be
With love,
Brian
Sunday, July 7, 2013
Two Miracles
Dear Friends,
A week ago, John and I visited the Krishna Temple in Dallas. Two miracles happened. John had not taken his shoes off in a public place for two years because of a serious foot condition. He finally took them off at the temple. This gesture represented a healing of both his foot and his inner state as well a sign of surrender to the Divine.
The second miracle happened to my state of mind. Almost everyone in the temple was standing, chanting different sanskrit slokas, and some people begin to dance to the rhythm of the drumming. I jumped in and then suddenly found myself bounding up and down and dancing in a circle around the drummers, singing:
Hare Krishna Hare Krishna
Krishna Krishna Hare Hare
Hare Rama Hare Rama
Rama Ram Hare Hare
As we whirled around, someone launched my body high in the air, and I became quite happy. The dancing and chanting was mesmerizing. As the chanting slowed, I walked over to John and stood for a while, and suddenly the mind plunged into a deep meditation. I nearly fell over, and in that moment, I realized that dancing can take someone to other realms of being. In the past, dancing had been associated with awkwardness and resistance. Now it became a key to unlock transcendental states of peace and love.
Today I visited the Dallas Meditation Center. Entering the main room, I immediately fell into a deeply peaceful meditation. Then we rose from our seats and began to do a walking meditation around the room. I focused on each small step, slowly walking around the perimeter of the room, being mindful of the breath. This focused action plunged my mind into a deep state of consciousness that almost caused my body to fall over. Never had I experienced such a profound state in the midst of walking. It shattered my beliefs about this method of meditation. New possibilities open now.
There are many ways to walk the Path. Let me try them and see what happens.
With love,
Brian
A week ago, John and I visited the Krishna Temple in Dallas. Two miracles happened. John had not taken his shoes off in a public place for two years because of a serious foot condition. He finally took them off at the temple. This gesture represented a healing of both his foot and his inner state as well a sign of surrender to the Divine.
The second miracle happened to my state of mind. Almost everyone in the temple was standing, chanting different sanskrit slokas, and some people begin to dance to the rhythm of the drumming. I jumped in and then suddenly found myself bounding up and down and dancing in a circle around the drummers, singing:
Hare Krishna Hare Krishna
Krishna Krishna Hare Hare
Hare Rama Hare Rama
Rama Ram Hare Hare
As we whirled around, someone launched my body high in the air, and I became quite happy. The dancing and chanting was mesmerizing. As the chanting slowed, I walked over to John and stood for a while, and suddenly the mind plunged into a deep meditation. I nearly fell over, and in that moment, I realized that dancing can take someone to other realms of being. In the past, dancing had been associated with awkwardness and resistance. Now it became a key to unlock transcendental states of peace and love.
Today I visited the Dallas Meditation Center. Entering the main room, I immediately fell into a deeply peaceful meditation. Then we rose from our seats and began to do a walking meditation around the room. I focused on each small step, slowly walking around the perimeter of the room, being mindful of the breath. This focused action plunged my mind into a deep state of consciousness that almost caused my body to fall over. Never had I experienced such a profound state in the midst of walking. It shattered my beliefs about this method of meditation. New possibilities open now.
There are many ways to walk the Path. Let me try them and see what happens.
With love,
Brian
Saturday, June 29, 2013
Mind has an agenda
Dear Friends,
I must tell you about the mind. It has an agenda. I noticed this so clearly today. I attended a yoga charity event in Arlington, Texas at the Dallas Cowboys Stadium. At least 150 people laid their mats upon the football field, and Tom led the huge group in an intense yoga class. At some point, I could not raise the arms over my head, and sweat was pouring down my face.
During the asanas, the mind kept going back to the thought that it needed to network with others...to find someone who would be interested in hosting satsang...to make it a "worthwhile" trip. So the mind was not fully concentrated on the asanas. After the asanas, I watched the Bhakti House Band concert, and suddenly the mind slipped into a deep meditation. For a while, it gave up the agenda and relaxed. I wondered, "What am I for?" Why does the mind always need to have a reason for doing things? Why can't it just rest and relax just for the sake of being?
In a deeper meditation, I found myself offering assistance after the band had completed the concert. I had totally forgotten to fulfill my fantasy - meeting lots of yoga teachers and creating connections. Instead I enjoyed breaking down the band's stage. Finally, I was really enjoying something!
It is fun to notice the agenda of the mind. Once the agenda is seen, it can be surrendered or at least relaxed. Then a more natural action comes forth, an action of service and love. Who says we need a reason to do things?
With love,
Brian
I must tell you about the mind. It has an agenda. I noticed this so clearly today. I attended a yoga charity event in Arlington, Texas at the Dallas Cowboys Stadium. At least 150 people laid their mats upon the football field, and Tom led the huge group in an intense yoga class. At some point, I could not raise the arms over my head, and sweat was pouring down my face.
During the asanas, the mind kept going back to the thought that it needed to network with others...to find someone who would be interested in hosting satsang...to make it a "worthwhile" trip. So the mind was not fully concentrated on the asanas. After the asanas, I watched the Bhakti House Band concert, and suddenly the mind slipped into a deep meditation. For a while, it gave up the agenda and relaxed. I wondered, "What am I for?" Why does the mind always need to have a reason for doing things? Why can't it just rest and relax just for the sake of being?
In a deeper meditation, I found myself offering assistance after the band had completed the concert. I had totally forgotten to fulfill my fantasy - meeting lots of yoga teachers and creating connections. Instead I enjoyed breaking down the band's stage. Finally, I was really enjoying something!
It is fun to notice the agenda of the mind. Once the agenda is seen, it can be surrendered or at least relaxed. Then a more natural action comes forth, an action of service and love. Who says we need a reason to do things?
With love,
Brian
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Amma the Hugging Saint
Dear Friends,
I visited Amma this past weekend in Dallas. The weekend was quite intense. No one to travel with. No one to room with. Not much sleep. Magically, I ended up with 3 roommates, sleeping on a full bed. Although I was not able to get a hug token, one came to me by chance. Although I came with no one, a number of friends appeared. In the wee hours of the morning, I was working in the kitchen, cleaning off huge dishes. Those folks in the kitchen, hidden away from the main hall, are the unsung heroes, tirelessly keeping the kitchen running smoothly.
I met Mani from Tulsa, Oklahoma on the 2nd day. His wife and 3 children were there. He taught me about faith, also called "sraddha." After meeting Amma, Mani experienced a series of synchronous events that he attributed to Amma's Grace. Through his trust in Amma's Grace, he lives in such Joy and enthusiasm. I am uplifted by his positivity. Indeed, I cannot help but smile, thinking of absolutely everything as the Will of the Guru. Floating on a river of Grace, I feel very excited to see what unfolds in life. Like a good book. The book of Brian has already been written. Thank you for your example, Mani. Let's read on and see what happens.
With love,
Brian
I visited Amma this past weekend in Dallas. The weekend was quite intense. No one to travel with. No one to room with. Not much sleep. Magically, I ended up with 3 roommates, sleeping on a full bed. Although I was not able to get a hug token, one came to me by chance. Although I came with no one, a number of friends appeared. In the wee hours of the morning, I was working in the kitchen, cleaning off huge dishes. Those folks in the kitchen, hidden away from the main hall, are the unsung heroes, tirelessly keeping the kitchen running smoothly.
I met Mani from Tulsa, Oklahoma on the 2nd day. His wife and 3 children were there. He taught me about faith, also called "sraddha." After meeting Amma, Mani experienced a series of synchronous events that he attributed to Amma's Grace. Through his trust in Amma's Grace, he lives in such Joy and enthusiasm. I am uplifted by his positivity. Indeed, I cannot help but smile, thinking of absolutely everything as the Will of the Guru. Floating on a river of Grace, I feel very excited to see what unfolds in life. Like a good book. The book of Brian has already been written. Thank you for your example, Mani. Let's read on and see what happens.
With love,
Brian
Thursday, June 20, 2013
Please teach me
Dear Friends,
I spent a lot of time in a particular town, holding satsangs almost every other day, and the gatherings were growing. So much enthusiasm about the Truth! Perhaps one day, I could settle in such a place. One person in particular really spread the word through her passionate interest in the teachings. She housed me, fed me, and invited so many people to join in these satsangs. At the end of my stay, we parted in tears of gratitude, and I drove away to the next stage of the journey, promising to return to do it again. Recently I discovered that she had moved on and no longer wanted to be a part of it.
My reaction is multi-dimensional. Did I do something wrong? Perhaps I had not reached out enough after my departure. Perhaps I had abandoned her. This is so mysterious. Why did this happen? Then another fearful feeling... I was attached to finding a place to settle where people are excited about Truth. Would this ever happen? Or perhaps, all of the gardens would die away, and I would have no place to go. Would all my work be for nothing? Perhaps I had not made a lasting impact anywhere. I have given up my previous life, and now I have nothing. No material things, no enduring satsang communities, no place to live... What is left of my life?
Realization came into my mind. My purpose is not to find a place to settle and set up an ashram. It is only to share the Energy with others. Friendships are never permanent, no matter how deep the connection. Ultimately this body is going to pass on. As one door closes, another one is revealed where I may be of more service. And finally, these satsang gardens are not mine nor I am responsible for the crowds of people that come. It is only the flow of the Energy. I must let go and surrender everything to the Divine Movement. Everything happens for the highest good. And finally, I am trying the best I can. I am ready to learn from my mistakes. I don't know how to be a good friend. Please teach me, Mother Maya. Whatever you want, I am at Your service.
With love,
Brian
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MkP09YhE2-0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MkP09YhE2-0
Wednesday, June 5, 2013
At the Lotus Feet of Swamiji
Dear Friends,
How does one develop Love and Devotion? There is one simple answer: by dedicating all of one's actions, thoughts and materials to the Lord. Swamiji is the embodiment of the Truth. By honoring Him, we honor our True Self - the One - the Infinite Being. The satsangs I hold are not mine. I don't know how the words come to my mouth nor do I know how the Energy manifests. I only know that I love Swamiji, and He takes care of the rest. So when we are in satsang, it is a powerful spiritual practice to put up a picture of Him, light a candle, burn some incense, and offer flowers. By honoring Him, we honor our Self, and our experience of satsang will be so much deeper. Our hearts open to this Holy event, and our meditations become profound. Let us honor our Soul. Let us show our Love. And as we express our gratitude, we return to the Source from whence we came.
With love,
Brian
How does one develop Love and Devotion? There is one simple answer: by dedicating all of one's actions, thoughts and materials to the Lord. Swamiji is the embodiment of the Truth. By honoring Him, we honor our True Self - the One - the Infinite Being. The satsangs I hold are not mine. I don't know how the words come to my mouth nor do I know how the Energy manifests. I only know that I love Swamiji, and He takes care of the rest. So when we are in satsang, it is a powerful spiritual practice to put up a picture of Him, light a candle, burn some incense, and offer flowers. By honoring Him, we honor our Self, and our experience of satsang will be so much deeper. Our hearts open to this Holy event, and our meditations become profound. Let us honor our Soul. Let us show our Love. And as we express our gratitude, we return to the Source from whence we came.
With love,
Brian
Tuesday, May 28, 2013
I'll fly away
Dear Friends,
There was a clunk at the glass kitchen door, and Maria exclaimed in surprise. I went outside and picked up the baby bird that had fallen to the ground stunned. I held it in the palm of my hand, holding a prayer in my heart as the tiny bird slowly turned its head. It blinked a few times and then closed its eyes. The soul flew away, and the body of the bird lay still. It was the first time I witnessed death so intimately. In moments, the candle of life departs the body. It could be today. I don't know when it will happen, but every moment slips by like the sand in an hourglass. How am I spending this precious moment of life? Yesterday is gone and tomorrow may never come yet I spend most of my days thinking about these phantoms of past and future.
I feel the most alive in the vibration of love, peace, and joy. How can I attune to this vibration now? Why do I keep putting it off and seeking temporary pleasures? I must let go of all these frivolous activities and seek the root of life itself from whence the vibration of love, peace, and joy come from. What is the source of my existence? Life shines all around and who created it all? Let me seek this source with all of my heart and all of my soul and let all other seeking fade away. Let me dive in the depths of my being and discover the life force itself. Nothing else is important.
I buried the body of the baby bird in the backyard. Thank you, my dear beloved bird. You are my friend, the messenger of my soul. You whisper in my ear, "Wake up! You, too, will fly away..."
With love,
Brian
There was a clunk at the glass kitchen door, and Maria exclaimed in surprise. I went outside and picked up the baby bird that had fallen to the ground stunned. I held it in the palm of my hand, holding a prayer in my heart as the tiny bird slowly turned its head. It blinked a few times and then closed its eyes. The soul flew away, and the body of the bird lay still. It was the first time I witnessed death so intimately. In moments, the candle of life departs the body. It could be today. I don't know when it will happen, but every moment slips by like the sand in an hourglass. How am I spending this precious moment of life? Yesterday is gone and tomorrow may never come yet I spend most of my days thinking about these phantoms of past and future.
I feel the most alive in the vibration of love, peace, and joy. How can I attune to this vibration now? Why do I keep putting it off and seeking temporary pleasures? I must let go of all these frivolous activities and seek the root of life itself from whence the vibration of love, peace, and joy come from. What is the source of my existence? Life shines all around and who created it all? Let me seek this source with all of my heart and all of my soul and let all other seeking fade away. Let me dive in the depths of my being and discover the life force itself. Nothing else is important.
I buried the body of the baby bird in the backyard. Thank you, my dear beloved bird. You are my friend, the messenger of my soul. You whisper in my ear, "Wake up! You, too, will fly away..."
With love,
Brian
Thursday, May 23, 2013
Fasting
Dear Friends,
In the book, Siddhartha, Herman Hesse writes of a character named Siddhartha who is seeking the meaning of existence. After becoming an ascetic for many years, he goes back into the "real world" and tries to find a job. In the interview with a rich merchant, he is asked about his qualifications. Siddhartha says he can do three things, "I can think. I can wait. I can fast." (Ch.6)
These are the key qualities in a spiritual seeker. When one can remain peaceful in the face of hunger, then one does not worry about money or having enough food. Indeed, these things are the main cause of anxiety in our world. When one can wait, then patience dawns on the person. He or she no longer becomes anxious about achieving things anymore - getting the right job, raising children well, etc. All will come in time. When one's mind is in complete equanimity, then thinking becomes clear, focused and powerful, and life is very easy - undistracted by negative emotions.
Today I am fasting and in silence. The mind wants to be distracted by food and speech and is pouring out so much negativity. I watch it pass and continue to follow the intention. It is a purification process in which darkness from the subconscious mind comes to the surface to be purged. None of these feelings and thoughts are permanent. They are clouds in the sky. Just let them pass. When I first started the fasting practice years ago, the mind would dread the day of fast. Now it is more at ease. Walking through the fire, impurities are burned away and the mind is cleansed. All practices are in honor of the One. The Truth. The Whole. Purna.
Jai Swamiji!
with love,
Brian
In the book, Siddhartha, Herman Hesse writes of a character named Siddhartha who is seeking the meaning of existence. After becoming an ascetic for many years, he goes back into the "real world" and tries to find a job. In the interview with a rich merchant, he is asked about his qualifications. Siddhartha says he can do three things, "I can think. I can wait. I can fast." (Ch.6)
These are the key qualities in a spiritual seeker. When one can remain peaceful in the face of hunger, then one does not worry about money or having enough food. Indeed, these things are the main cause of anxiety in our world. When one can wait, then patience dawns on the person. He or she no longer becomes anxious about achieving things anymore - getting the right job, raising children well, etc. All will come in time. When one's mind is in complete equanimity, then thinking becomes clear, focused and powerful, and life is very easy - undistracted by negative emotions.
Today I am fasting and in silence. The mind wants to be distracted by food and speech and is pouring out so much negativity. I watch it pass and continue to follow the intention. It is a purification process in which darkness from the subconscious mind comes to the surface to be purged. None of these feelings and thoughts are permanent. They are clouds in the sky. Just let them pass. When I first started the fasting practice years ago, the mind would dread the day of fast. Now it is more at ease. Walking through the fire, impurities are burned away and the mind is cleansed. All practices are in honor of the One. The Truth. The Whole. Purna.
Jai Swamiji!
with love,
Brian
Monday, May 20, 2013
A Note that Opens my Heart
Dear Friends,
Durga Devi - also known as Donna - opened her home to satsang. She stepped into the unknown, inviting her friends to this event. Satsang is unknown for me too. I'm surprised words come out of my mouth, considering I don't have any plans. "Can you tell me the format of the satsang?" Durga Devi asked. "No, I have no idea. Let's see what happens," I replied. I suppose this reply was not very comforting, but it certainly is mysterious. Truth is a Mystery. As I let go into the Mystery, I face all of my fears, nervousness and anxiety, and they dissolve in the Energy. My mind is fairly empty as satsang begins, and then the mouth starts talking about something. Where does it come from?
During satsang, Cotton Candy (the almost blind dog) came up to me to visit and later on, the cat came to visit me. Seems that the animals really like satsang. Jeff, Durga Devi's husband, offered his help immediately in whatever he could do to support the satsang. I am so thankful for his welcoming presence.
During the second satsang, the lighted candle behind me burst into bright flames. This was rather unusual. I picked up the candle to blow it out and burned my finger. Durga Devi brought some aloe vera plant to soothe the burn. Some days later, she came to a meditation in which I fell off my chair in a faint and burned my face on the rug. The face felt like it was on fire.
In a later satsang at Tina's home, Durga Devi gave me an envelope at the beginning, and I opened it. Inside there was a note which is attached below. It included a couple of aloe vera stems. I put some on my face and started to laugh and laugh. And now as I read this note, tears fill my eyes. I am here to serve You, dear Mother Divine. My life is for You. Let me wash Your feet with my tears of gratitude.
With love,
Brian
Durga Devi - also known as Donna - opened her home to satsang. She stepped into the unknown, inviting her friends to this event. Satsang is unknown for me too. I'm surprised words come out of my mouth, considering I don't have any plans. "Can you tell me the format of the satsang?" Durga Devi asked. "No, I have no idea. Let's see what happens," I replied. I suppose this reply was not very comforting, but it certainly is mysterious. Truth is a Mystery. As I let go into the Mystery, I face all of my fears, nervousness and anxiety, and they dissolve in the Energy. My mind is fairly empty as satsang begins, and then the mouth starts talking about something. Where does it come from?
During satsang, Cotton Candy (the almost blind dog) came up to me to visit and later on, the cat came to visit me. Seems that the animals really like satsang. Jeff, Durga Devi's husband, offered his help immediately in whatever he could do to support the satsang. I am so thankful for his welcoming presence.
During the second satsang, the lighted candle behind me burst into bright flames. This was rather unusual. I picked up the candle to blow it out and burned my finger. Durga Devi brought some aloe vera plant to soothe the burn. Some days later, she came to a meditation in which I fell off my chair in a faint and burned my face on the rug. The face felt like it was on fire.
In a later satsang at Tina's home, Durga Devi gave me an envelope at the beginning, and I opened it. Inside there was a note which is attached below. It included a couple of aloe vera stems. I put some on my face and started to laugh and laugh. And now as I read this note, tears fill my eyes. I am here to serve You, dear Mother Divine. My life is for You. Let me wash Your feet with my tears of gratitude.
With love,
Brian
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Face Dive
Dear Friends,
After chanting for 20 minutes at the meditation group in White Plains, I took a deep breath and relaxed into a deep meditation. Suddenly I lost all sense of the world and thoughts passed by the mind very slowly. Their was a distant feeling of the neck cracking and the sound of gasps all around. Then opening my eyes, I looked around and wondered, "where am I? who are these people?" It appears I had fainted and I picked up my head from the floor and and sat back on the seat. "Are you ok?" they asked. I said, "I'm trying to find out who I am and where I am..." The group stared at me in concern, but I was totally at ease and relaxed. My face was on fire from the rug burns. They asked me if I might sit on the couch instead of on a precarious chair. "I'm good," I said as I grabbed hold of the sides of the chair. Overall, it was a very nice meditation. I'll think I'll go to the chiropractor tomorrow.
With love,
Brian
After chanting for 20 minutes at the meditation group in White Plains, I took a deep breath and relaxed into a deep meditation. Suddenly I lost all sense of the world and thoughts passed by the mind very slowly. Their was a distant feeling of the neck cracking and the sound of gasps all around. Then opening my eyes, I looked around and wondered, "where am I? who are these people?" It appears I had fainted and I picked up my head from the floor and and sat back on the seat. "Are you ok?" they asked. I said, "I'm trying to find out who I am and where I am..." The group stared at me in concern, but I was totally at ease and relaxed. My face was on fire from the rug burns. They asked me if I might sit on the couch instead of on a precarious chair. "I'm good," I said as I grabbed hold of the sides of the chair. Overall, it was a very nice meditation. I'll think I'll go to the chiropractor tomorrow.
With love,
Brian
Saturday, May 4, 2013
Spiritual Retreat
Dear Friends,
What is the purpose of a spiritual retreat supported by the Energy of Svami Purna? We are in the field of Light which heals the body, mind, and soul and clears karma, bringing us into a deeper state of consciousness and a new experience of Life itself. We transcend normal ways of thinking about the world and experience deeper feelings of Joy, Peace, and Love. Our meditation becomes more profound and concentrated as we dive deeper into the essence of our being. We come together to create a sacred space for supporting one another on the spiritual path. We see life in more vivid colors. Through music, we sing our praises to the True Self, That which is the Source of all Creation. We journey back to our True Nature, the Pure Soul, the Infinite Self - beyond all suffering and duality. Please join me in this journey back Home. It is a very special opportunity...
With love,
Brian
What is the purpose of a spiritual retreat supported by the Energy of Svami Purna? We are in the field of Light which heals the body, mind, and soul and clears karma, bringing us into a deeper state of consciousness and a new experience of Life itself. We transcend normal ways of thinking about the world and experience deeper feelings of Joy, Peace, and Love. Our meditation becomes more profound and concentrated as we dive deeper into the essence of our being. We come together to create a sacred space for supporting one another on the spiritual path. We see life in more vivid colors. Through music, we sing our praises to the True Self, That which is the Source of all Creation. We journey back to our True Nature, the Pure Soul, the Infinite Self - beyond all suffering and duality. Please join me in this journey back Home. It is a very special opportunity...
With love,
Brian
Saturday, April 27, 2013
Meeting Mataji
Dear Friends,
Recently I met Merrill and Mataji in White Plains, NY through a meditation Meet-Up group. After having dinner with them, I attended Mataji's class, and at the end, Maria, one of the students, offered to house me. At night, I tried to turn on Persistence, but she was dead. I had left the headlights on. So Maria called her husband, Harry, who immediately came to assist. He attached the jumper cables and after a few minutes, Persistence came to life. I followed them home and settled in my new room. Satsangs have been happening every day. Today I attended a meditation at the home of Mataji and Merrill. At the end, they asked me to hold kirtan (singing to Divinity). I had composed a song called "Mataji, Jai, Jai" which we all sang together. I had tears in my eyes. Mataji held her palms together and continued to express her namaste throughout the music. She is the expression of the Mother of the Universe. I bow to the Divine Mother which breathes life into our heart, mind, and body. She is the Creation itself, the life force of manifestation. Oh, Divine Mother, bring us into Your arms and show us how to love You.
Always at Your service,
Brian
Recently I met Merrill and Mataji in White Plains, NY through a meditation Meet-Up group. After having dinner with them, I attended Mataji's class, and at the end, Maria, one of the students, offered to house me. At night, I tried to turn on Persistence, but she was dead. I had left the headlights on. So Maria called her husband, Harry, who immediately came to assist. He attached the jumper cables and after a few minutes, Persistence came to life. I followed them home and settled in my new room. Satsangs have been happening every day. Today I attended a meditation at the home of Mataji and Merrill. At the end, they asked me to hold kirtan (singing to Divinity). I had composed a song called "Mataji, Jai, Jai" which we all sang together. I had tears in my eyes. Mataji held her palms together and continued to express her namaste throughout the music. She is the expression of the Mother of the Universe. I bow to the Divine Mother which breathes life into our heart, mind, and body. She is the Creation itself, the life force of manifestation. Oh, Divine Mother, bring us into Your arms and show us how to love You.
Always at Your service,
Brian
Monday, April 22, 2013
Dissolution of the World
Dear Friends,
Consider your experience of the world. It is all based on thought, and all thoughts are passing feelings. None of them are permanent. Even the idea of "me." The sense of "me" changes as well as thoughts about others, the world and God. None of it is the Truth. All thought is a passing illusion made up in the mind. Therefore, our experience of reality is untrue. It is purely based in this illusion. When we believe firmly in the illusion - that there is a me and a separate world - we suffering according to this identification. Whatever happens to the "me" cause happiness or sadness. Thus, life is like living on a little boat in the ocean that can be capsized any moment by a big wave.
The purpose of Jnana Yoga is to contemplate on the reality that we have created out of the identification with the ego. Look at every thought and say, "not this, not this." This is not me, this is not me. And one by one, the belief in separate me dissolves and thus, the whole world disappears from the mind and one is left with the True Self, the Absolute Reality, That which is inconceivable and beyond the mind. Then there is no one left to suffer. The true Awakening is the awakening from the dream of thought, the identification with mind and body. We are so attached to thought and body that we truly believe we are these things. In other words, the more we indulge in the illusion of thought and desire and habitual patterns of life, the more we solidify the sense of me. The more solid the me, the deeper the suffering. The more we let go of the sense of me, its selfishness and desires, the less suffering occurs. Let us begin to question this separate sense of self. Who am I? As the ego dies, consciousness is freed from the person, and Truth is revealed - infinite, whole, complete...Purna
With love,
Brian
Consider your experience of the world. It is all based on thought, and all thoughts are passing feelings. None of them are permanent. Even the idea of "me." The sense of "me" changes as well as thoughts about others, the world and God. None of it is the Truth. All thought is a passing illusion made up in the mind. Therefore, our experience of reality is untrue. It is purely based in this illusion. When we believe firmly in the illusion - that there is a me and a separate world - we suffering according to this identification. Whatever happens to the "me" cause happiness or sadness. Thus, life is like living on a little boat in the ocean that can be capsized any moment by a big wave.
The purpose of Jnana Yoga is to contemplate on the reality that we have created out of the identification with the ego. Look at every thought and say, "not this, not this." This is not me, this is not me. And one by one, the belief in separate me dissolves and thus, the whole world disappears from the mind and one is left with the True Self, the Absolute Reality, That which is inconceivable and beyond the mind. Then there is no one left to suffer. The true Awakening is the awakening from the dream of thought, the identification with mind and body. We are so attached to thought and body that we truly believe we are these things. In other words, the more we indulge in the illusion of thought and desire and habitual patterns of life, the more we solidify the sense of me. The more solid the me, the deeper the suffering. The more we let go of the sense of me, its selfishness and desires, the less suffering occurs. Let us begin to question this separate sense of self. Who am I? As the ego dies, consciousness is freed from the person, and Truth is revealed - infinite, whole, complete...Purna
With love,
Brian
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
I am One, I want to be Many
Dear Friends,
I contemplate the statement, "I am One, I want to be many." How is it possible to explain this koan? If I am One, how can there be an individual and many objects? Yet it is happening. The One Divine Mind dreams itself into countless characters that play out their roles according to their programming or karma. Yet still there is only One Being that cannot be seen, cannot be touched and cannot be understood.
Consider a dream at night. I dream I am one character interacting with so many other characters and it seems so real that I may start to sweat or scream in my sleep. Indeed, I truly believe I am that character in a dream world. Yet when I wake up, I find that none of it actually happened. My mind created all the characters and played them so realistically that it became the reality. Yet now I find myself waking up as "me" again. The illusion of the dream was so real that I believed it to be true.
What if this reality now - the Brian character typing on a computer - is the exact same scenario. I must wake up one more time from the Brian-identification to find out that it was all a dream. That it seemed so convincing that I took it seriously and suffered for it. When consciousness is "woken" from the dream, it becomes what it is. The Ultimate Truth. The Divine Mind. The Infinite Presence. The entire Brian-character was just a dream.
"I am One, I want to be Many." How is it possible?
With love,
Brian
Sunday, March 24, 2013
Love of the Soul
Dear Friends,
The great Sage of the Upanishads, Yajnavalkya said to his wife, Maitreyi, "In truth, it is not for the love of a husband that a husband is dear, but for the love of the soul in the husband that a husband is dear."
One could write volumes on this single statement, it is that deep. Divine Love, otherwise known as Prem in Sanskrit, is infinite and unconditional love. Reasonless love. The Heart never shuts down. It is embraces the Soul that underlies all of creation. This is the only possible way to experience Divine Love. If there is any trace of difference in the mind, then the Heart is not absolutely open to everything. If everything is realized to be the One Soul, then Love is all around and there is nothing but That. With Prem, there is no you and I, not this and that. There is only One Being. One Heart. This Love is incomprehensible to the mind. It is only when the mind is gone that this Love dawns. The mind is the lens through which consciousness is blinded, so that the recognition of One Soul is lost. Therefore, it is a very good thing when you have lost your mind. Divine madness dawns and the Beloved appears everywhere. A person may be in tears all the time because his Beloved is felt in every experience. Imagining a time when you fell romantically in love with someone, and life felt so exciting and vibrant. Why couldn't you sustain that? Wouldn't it be overwhelming to experience this feeling all the time? My Beloved is immanent in all things, and I am lost in the power of this love. I am drowned in the Ocean of Nectar.
The road to Prem means giving up all conceptions of life, all desires, and all the fundamental beliefs we have of Reality. Only then may we enter the realm of the Heart, and the lover and Beloved become One.
At Your Service,
Brian
The great Sage of the Upanishads, Yajnavalkya said to his wife, Maitreyi, "In truth, it is not for the love of a husband that a husband is dear, but for the love of the soul in the husband that a husband is dear."
One could write volumes on this single statement, it is that deep. Divine Love, otherwise known as Prem in Sanskrit, is infinite and unconditional love. Reasonless love. The Heart never shuts down. It is embraces the Soul that underlies all of creation. This is the only possible way to experience Divine Love. If there is any trace of difference in the mind, then the Heart is not absolutely open to everything. If everything is realized to be the One Soul, then Love is all around and there is nothing but That. With Prem, there is no you and I, not this and that. There is only One Being. One Heart. This Love is incomprehensible to the mind. It is only when the mind is gone that this Love dawns. The mind is the lens through which consciousness is blinded, so that the recognition of One Soul is lost. Therefore, it is a very good thing when you have lost your mind. Divine madness dawns and the Beloved appears everywhere. A person may be in tears all the time because his Beloved is felt in every experience. Imagining a time when you fell romantically in love with someone, and life felt so exciting and vibrant. Why couldn't you sustain that? Wouldn't it be overwhelming to experience this feeling all the time? My Beloved is immanent in all things, and I am lost in the power of this love. I am drowned in the Ocean of Nectar.
The road to Prem means giving up all conceptions of life, all desires, and all the fundamental beliefs we have of Reality. Only then may we enter the realm of the Heart, and the lover and Beloved become One.
At Your Service,
Brian
Saturday, March 16, 2013
Devotion gives you wings
Dear Friends,
Devotion is the combined power of love and dedication. When you love something so much, you will spend every second of the day thinking about it and serving its cause. My devotion is to Swami Purna, the essence of Truth. That is why I chose to take this journey.
Truth is important to me. It is the Source of who we are. It is why we exist. Out of Truth comes the qualities of love, peace, and joy. We are all seeking these qualities. We all want permanent happiness. Normal daily thoughts have never given us permanent happiness. And every moment of our existence on this planet has been dominated by thought! We live in a world of thought. This is the Maya, the illusion, the imagination of the mind. The mind can never experience Truth. It is only a filter. The purpose of satsang is to cancel out all thoughts so that we can experience Reality as it is, not as the mind experiences it. We come to satsang to empty our mind, not get more information. As the dualities of our mind dissolve, we disappear and only the Mystery is left.
Let us devote ourselves to the Mystery. It is the cessation of suffering and the dawn of true Peace. Wouldn't it be nice to no longer be bound by the limits of the mind? Wouldn't it be nice to go to the Great Beyond where no person has gone before? This quest is worth living and dying for. I cling to the feet of His Grace Svami Purna who represents this Presence. By connecting to the mighty Ocean, the drop becomes the Ocean. Let us return to where we came from. Let us go Home. The Beloved is waiting.
With love,
Brian
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
A Baby likes the Holy Name!
Dear Friends,
I am staying with Christopher and Kimberly in Opelika, Alabama for 2 weeks. Their child's name is Asha. Asha is 7 months old. Many nights, Asha's crying wakes my body up, and I can feel the grumpiness. "I'm tired, it's loud," says the mind. But she drifts off to sleep quite quickly after someone soothes her. One night at around 2am, she cried for a long time in spite of all the soothing. Perhaps she was sick, perhaps her teeth were hurting. Then Kimberly got desperate. She said, "Will you play the harmonium and chant mantra for her?" I agreed. So she placed Asha on the floor in front of the harmonium and I started to play. Soon she was not crying anymore and her mouth agape, listening to the singing. She appeared to be stunned. Every time I quieted down, she started to complain again. So I chanted and chanted with Kim for 40 minutes or so. "Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna, Krishna Krishna, Hare Hare, Hare Rama, Hare Rama, Rama Rama, Hare Hare" - the great Mahamantra. And as I chanted, the holy mantra took over the mind and my mood became happier and happier until soon, I was absorbed in the energy. It seemed to be a rather transcendental state. And then Asha was asleep, and she went back to bed, content with the sound of Krishna.
This was the case with Chaitanya Mahaprabhu, an incarnation of Krishna who cried as a baby until everyone started chanting Hari. Then he stopped and smiled happily. His purpose was to teach people to sing the name of Hari all the time, for it would purify the sins of the heart, mind, and soul. Asha was teaching this lesson too. It is beautiful how the mind can move from a grumpy state to a deep meditation within minutes even in the middle of the night. Now I wake up to the crying and pray for Asha's healing, and the mind does not dwell in negativity.
May the Lord Hari bless our meditations and bring happiness in our lives.
With love,
Brian
I am staying with Christopher and Kimberly in Opelika, Alabama for 2 weeks. Their child's name is Asha. Asha is 7 months old. Many nights, Asha's crying wakes my body up, and I can feel the grumpiness. "I'm tired, it's loud," says the mind. But she drifts off to sleep quite quickly after someone soothes her. One night at around 2am, she cried for a long time in spite of all the soothing. Perhaps she was sick, perhaps her teeth were hurting. Then Kimberly got desperate. She said, "Will you play the harmonium and chant mantra for her?" I agreed. So she placed Asha on the floor in front of the harmonium and I started to play. Soon she was not crying anymore and her mouth agape, listening to the singing. She appeared to be stunned. Every time I quieted down, she started to complain again. So I chanted and chanted with Kim for 40 minutes or so. "Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna, Krishna Krishna, Hare Hare, Hare Rama, Hare Rama, Rama Rama, Hare Hare" - the great Mahamantra. And as I chanted, the holy mantra took over the mind and my mood became happier and happier until soon, I was absorbed in the energy. It seemed to be a rather transcendental state. And then Asha was asleep, and she went back to bed, content with the sound of Krishna.
This was the case with Chaitanya Mahaprabhu, an incarnation of Krishna who cried as a baby until everyone started chanting Hari. Then he stopped and smiled happily. His purpose was to teach people to sing the name of Hari all the time, for it would purify the sins of the heart, mind, and soul. Asha was teaching this lesson too. It is beautiful how the mind can move from a grumpy state to a deep meditation within minutes even in the middle of the night. Now I wake up to the crying and pray for Asha's healing, and the mind does not dwell in negativity.
May the Lord Hari bless our meditations and bring happiness in our lives.
With love,
Brian
Monday, February 11, 2013
I don't want to die
Dear Friends,
I am staying with Tim in an apartment near a graveyard in Tallahassee. Many days, I go out walking through the graveyard to say prayers for the departed souls. During these walks, I also contemplate on death. Bodies come and go on this planet by the billions. What is the point? The moment the body is born here, it is on the road to death. Most bodies spend their whole lives trying to make the body comfortable with food, sleep, sex, entertainment, fidgeting, fine clothes. And if these are taken away, the mind goes into suffering and pain. Lifetime after lifetime, body comes and goes. In a blink of an eye, this body will go. How many times will I reincarnate into another creature that suffers the ups and downs of this world? Hundreds of thousands of lifetimes so far. I have been an insect, a reptile, a deer, a monkey, a murderer, a monk... I have done it all over and over again by my own choice! The mind believes it is a body so it comes back as a body. After indulging in all the fantastic pleasures of the body and mind for millions of years, I am ready to step off the endless wheel of pleasure and pain. To let go of the consciousness, "I am a body and mind."
When the Buddha saw death and decaying bodies around his town, He decided that He was not going to follow the same road as everyone else. And of course, through the purification of His mind, body, and soul, His consciousness was freed and it returned to the Whole. This path means letting go of all addictions, desires, and identification with the mind and body. Breaking the "prison" of the mind by using the mind itself! Naturally, the path requires a complete transformation of one's life and thoughts.
What binds me to body consciousness? Comfort! So challenging the body's comfort zone is a powerful practice. Like being in a cold environment, eating different foods than normal, sitting in half-lotus position. Challenging the body's normal patterns and becoming okay with not-normal circumstances. Challenging the mind's comfort zone. So going out to talk with new people when the mind is more comfortable with old friends. To really understand the point of view of others. Not-normal mind situations. As I open up to discomfort, the mind becomes more soft, flexible, and patient and not so many things bother the mind. Then the mind is not thinking so much anymore, "How can I become more comfortable in this situation?" And it starts to quiet down and go into meditation even while the body moves about. This is the beginning of peace. When the mind can accept all circumstances without complaint. When comfort is no longer an issue! A few yogis have come to this point, but most people in this world are not willing to give up comfort. Yes, my mind and body are not so willing, but through a strong intention, the desires are following away one by one. This intention comes from an inner devotion to the Divine, the Supreme Presence, Svami Purna...
Let us spend our remaining days seeking the Eternal, the Soul beyond the body. Let us pry away the attachment of the Soul to the body and return to Beingness, the Great Beyond. Let us break through the barriers of the mind and step off the Wheel of Samsara. Let us merge into the Whole.
With love,
Brian
I am staying with Tim in an apartment near a graveyard in Tallahassee. Many days, I go out walking through the graveyard to say prayers for the departed souls. During these walks, I also contemplate on death. Bodies come and go on this planet by the billions. What is the point? The moment the body is born here, it is on the road to death. Most bodies spend their whole lives trying to make the body comfortable with food, sleep, sex, entertainment, fidgeting, fine clothes. And if these are taken away, the mind goes into suffering and pain. Lifetime after lifetime, body comes and goes. In a blink of an eye, this body will go. How many times will I reincarnate into another creature that suffers the ups and downs of this world? Hundreds of thousands of lifetimes so far. I have been an insect, a reptile, a deer, a monkey, a murderer, a monk... I have done it all over and over again by my own choice! The mind believes it is a body so it comes back as a body. After indulging in all the fantastic pleasures of the body and mind for millions of years, I am ready to step off the endless wheel of pleasure and pain. To let go of the consciousness, "I am a body and mind."
When the Buddha saw death and decaying bodies around his town, He decided that He was not going to follow the same road as everyone else. And of course, through the purification of His mind, body, and soul, His consciousness was freed and it returned to the Whole. This path means letting go of all addictions, desires, and identification with the mind and body. Breaking the "prison" of the mind by using the mind itself! Naturally, the path requires a complete transformation of one's life and thoughts.
What binds me to body consciousness? Comfort! So challenging the body's comfort zone is a powerful practice. Like being in a cold environment, eating different foods than normal, sitting in half-lotus position. Challenging the body's normal patterns and becoming okay with not-normal circumstances. Challenging the mind's comfort zone. So going out to talk with new people when the mind is more comfortable with old friends. To really understand the point of view of others. Not-normal mind situations. As I open up to discomfort, the mind becomes more soft, flexible, and patient and not so many things bother the mind. Then the mind is not thinking so much anymore, "How can I become more comfortable in this situation?" And it starts to quiet down and go into meditation even while the body moves about. This is the beginning of peace. When the mind can accept all circumstances without complaint. When comfort is no longer an issue! A few yogis have come to this point, but most people in this world are not willing to give up comfort. Yes, my mind and body are not so willing, but through a strong intention, the desires are following away one by one. This intention comes from an inner devotion to the Divine, the Supreme Presence, Svami Purna...
Let us spend our remaining days seeking the Eternal, the Soul beyond the body. Let us pry away the attachment of the Soul to the body and return to Beingness, the Great Beyond. Let us break through the barriers of the mind and step off the Wheel of Samsara. Let us merge into the Whole.
With love,
Brian
Monday, February 4, 2013
Power of Mantra
Dear Friends,
Mantra is an extraordinary practice. However, at some point, mantra flows naturally, so it becomes a part of the being rather than a practice. Mantra is the most effective when it is initiated by the Satguru. Then the word becomes a "piece" of the guru, a holy word that may bring one all the way to realization of one's True Nature. There are many spiritual aspirants that have chanted the holy name until all karma is burned in the Fire. Valmiki was one sage who received the holy name, Ram, from Sage Narada. He chanted Ram constantly until he became enlightened, and then he wrote the Ramayana, one of the most influential literary works in all of history. This is the result of mantra.
One may chant a mantra so often that it chants silently by itself inside the Heart. A mantra invokes the gods that within us. Gods represent energy such as love, peace, and joy. Here is the mahamantra:
Hare Krishna Hare Krishna
Krishna Krishna Hare Hare
Hare Rama Hare Rama
Rama Rama Hare Hare
This one is known throughout the world. When invoked with the blessing of the Guru, it invokes Krishna, the Supreme Presence, to bring us to Him. It assists a person in dissolving into the Cosmic Presence that is beyond the mind. It is not possible to understand. As I feel the energy of the mantra, I become more devoted to it. When blocks such as boredom or frustration come up, I let them go and re-connect to the energy. Chanting the mantra with love, humility, joy, and peace is the best way to connect. It can be fun to read the amazing stories of Krishna in the Srimad Bhagavatam to increase one's devotion to Krishna, and therefore, one may connect more deeply to the mantra.
I bow down to the Holy Word of the Guru, that which brings me across the ocean of suffering. May the Holy Name heal all beings in this world.
With love,
Brian
Mantra is an extraordinary practice. However, at some point, mantra flows naturally, so it becomes a part of the being rather than a practice. Mantra is the most effective when it is initiated by the Satguru. Then the word becomes a "piece" of the guru, a holy word that may bring one all the way to realization of one's True Nature. There are many spiritual aspirants that have chanted the holy name until all karma is burned in the Fire. Valmiki was one sage who received the holy name, Ram, from Sage Narada. He chanted Ram constantly until he became enlightened, and then he wrote the Ramayana, one of the most influential literary works in all of history. This is the result of mantra.
One may chant a mantra so often that it chants silently by itself inside the Heart. A mantra invokes the gods that within us. Gods represent energy such as love, peace, and joy. Here is the mahamantra:
Hare Krishna Hare Krishna
Krishna Krishna Hare Hare
Hare Rama Hare Rama
Rama Rama Hare Hare
This one is known throughout the world. When invoked with the blessing of the Guru, it invokes Krishna, the Supreme Presence, to bring us to Him. It assists a person in dissolving into the Cosmic Presence that is beyond the mind. It is not possible to understand. As I feel the energy of the mantra, I become more devoted to it. When blocks such as boredom or frustration come up, I let them go and re-connect to the energy. Chanting the mantra with love, humility, joy, and peace is the best way to connect. It can be fun to read the amazing stories of Krishna in the Srimad Bhagavatam to increase one's devotion to Krishna, and therefore, one may connect more deeply to the mantra.
I bow down to the Holy Word of the Guru, that which brings me across the ocean of suffering. May the Holy Name heal all beings in this world.
With love,
Brian
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Facing fears
Dear Friends,
I have found that the greatest spiritual practice is facing fears. Fear is my biggest block to greater realization. Fear of confrontation, fear of not having enough money, fear of awkwardness, fear of the cold, fear of the heat, fear of judgment. Fear leads to anxiety, nervousness, defensivness, and in general, a closing down of the heart. Naturally, I have contemplated on fears in order to see through their illusion. Yet when I am face to face with the situation, the fear comes once again. Here is a good example.
To follow up with the possibility of setting up a satsang, I called a yoga studio and spoke with the owner, someone I did not know. I felt an uncontrollable fear that she would reject me or reprimand me, and my speech became awkward and muted. But I did not die. So I called the next studio with less fear. The more I put myself in this situation, the more confidence grows. This world gives so many opportunities to face my deepest fears. And when I meet them, I begin to stand up straighter and freely express myself, not suppressed by the fear. When I shake death's hand, a part of my ego dies, and Spirit is uncovered.
I also notice that I suppress the feeling of fear for fear of showing any sign of fear to someone else. The belief is that it is a sign of weakness. For instance, trembling or shaking or shying away. Yet fully allowing the fear is a sign of vulnerability. A sign of authenticity. It is the dissolution of the "tough guy" persona. I don't try to hide fear from myself anymore. Who would I be without the "tough guy" costume? Someone willing to embrace the fearful boy inside...to accept him as he is. To let him be himself. When he gets to experience his fear, he is true to himself. He is so thankful to be given this chance. He is accepted. He is loved. This is the power of authenticity.
With love,
Brian
I have found that the greatest spiritual practice is facing fears. Fear is my biggest block to greater realization. Fear of confrontation, fear of not having enough money, fear of awkwardness, fear of the cold, fear of the heat, fear of judgment. Fear leads to anxiety, nervousness, defensivness, and in general, a closing down of the heart. Naturally, I have contemplated on fears in order to see through their illusion. Yet when I am face to face with the situation, the fear comes once again. Here is a good example.
To follow up with the possibility of setting up a satsang, I called a yoga studio and spoke with the owner, someone I did not know. I felt an uncontrollable fear that she would reject me or reprimand me, and my speech became awkward and muted. But I did not die. So I called the next studio with less fear. The more I put myself in this situation, the more confidence grows. This world gives so many opportunities to face my deepest fears. And when I meet them, I begin to stand up straighter and freely express myself, not suppressed by the fear. When I shake death's hand, a part of my ego dies, and Spirit is uncovered.
I also notice that I suppress the feeling of fear for fear of showing any sign of fear to someone else. The belief is that it is a sign of weakness. For instance, trembling or shaking or shying away. Yet fully allowing the fear is a sign of vulnerability. A sign of authenticity. It is the dissolution of the "tough guy" persona. I don't try to hide fear from myself anymore. Who would I be without the "tough guy" costume? Someone willing to embrace the fearful boy inside...to accept him as he is. To let him be himself. When he gets to experience his fear, he is true to himself. He is so thankful to be given this chance. He is accepted. He is loved. This is the power of authenticity.
With love,
Brian
Friday, January 11, 2013
Bow Down?
Dear Friends,
I have visited so many spiritual teachers and been exposed to so many gurus. Each one's expression is different. Each one has a different energy. I cannot say which one is the best. But it is very clear to me when a particular teacher resonates. And my mind may be open to one teaching more than another at different times. The more the mind is open, the more I fall in love with the teacher, the more my resistance falls away, the more powerfully the teachings flow through me. Indeed, the feelings of love and openness become the teacher and the teaching, and that is what I surrender to. The teacher represents the inner power within my own self. The guide comes in physical form to open the guide living within my self. Surrender to the master means surrendering to my higher self. Until my full potential is realized, it is a very valuable practice to attune to the Teacher. What I meditate on, I become. So why not meditate on the Teacher that has realized its divine potential?
In 2008, I went to a retreat with Svami Purna in New York. The moment He walked into that bookstore, I was overwhelmed with emotion, and I knew that this Being would be my teacher for this lifetime and all future lifetimes. It was my desire to attune to this Being every second of the day for as long as the body breathed. When I say Being, I mean Presence, not the physical body. The body is a wonderful reminder of the Presence but not the actual Presence. So when I bow down to the physical body, I am actually bowing to the Presence which is beyond form, which is my own True Self. This may be difficult to understand because the True Self is beyond conception of mind. Bowing to the Teacher is a sign of love and reverence to the One True Self. This is why we say "namaste" when we greet one another. I bow to the Divine in you. That which is pure love, peace, and joy. Let us worship these qualities and as we do, we become their very essence.
With Love,
Brian
I have visited so many spiritual teachers and been exposed to so many gurus. Each one's expression is different. Each one has a different energy. I cannot say which one is the best. But it is very clear to me when a particular teacher resonates. And my mind may be open to one teaching more than another at different times. The more the mind is open, the more I fall in love with the teacher, the more my resistance falls away, the more powerfully the teachings flow through me. Indeed, the feelings of love and openness become the teacher and the teaching, and that is what I surrender to. The teacher represents the inner power within my own self. The guide comes in physical form to open the guide living within my self. Surrender to the master means surrendering to my higher self. Until my full potential is realized, it is a very valuable practice to attune to the Teacher. What I meditate on, I become. So why not meditate on the Teacher that has realized its divine potential?
In 2008, I went to a retreat with Svami Purna in New York. The moment He walked into that bookstore, I was overwhelmed with emotion, and I knew that this Being would be my teacher for this lifetime and all future lifetimes. It was my desire to attune to this Being every second of the day for as long as the body breathed. When I say Being, I mean Presence, not the physical body. The body is a wonderful reminder of the Presence but not the actual Presence. So when I bow down to the physical body, I am actually bowing to the Presence which is beyond form, which is my own True Self. This may be difficult to understand because the True Self is beyond conception of mind. Bowing to the Teacher is a sign of love and reverence to the One True Self. This is why we say "namaste" when we greet one another. I bow to the Divine in you. That which is pure love, peace, and joy. Let us worship these qualities and as we do, we become their very essence.
With Love,
Brian
Monday, January 7, 2013
Wander for Truth Online Events
Dear Friends,
You can watch satsangs online through http://www.ustream.tv/channel/wander-for-truth. We hold live events here which are announced at http://www.facebook.com/SatsangWithBrianLottman. You can "like" this page which will inform you of any future postings on this page. On www.wanderfortruth.com, there is a Mailing List tab to sign up for e-mails regarding future events too.
It is quite powerful to set an intention to connect to the energy of the satsang as it begins. Let go of all resistance and opinions and just surrender to the power of the gathering. Be open and in a mode of receiving. The words can be nice, but they are a doorway into the realm beyond. Feel the subtle energy and sink into this feeling. This energy will meditate you and heal your being. The deeper you go into meditation, the more you may be healed. Enjoy your Self!
With love,
Brian
You can watch satsangs online through http://www.ustream.tv/channel/wander-for-truth. We hold live events here which are announced at http://www.facebook.com/SatsangWithBrianLottman. You can "like" this page which will inform you of any future postings on this page. On www.wanderfortruth.com, there is a Mailing List tab to sign up for e-mails regarding future events too.
It is quite powerful to set an intention to connect to the energy of the satsang as it begins. Let go of all resistance and opinions and just surrender to the power of the gathering. Be open and in a mode of receiving. The words can be nice, but they are a doorway into the realm beyond. Feel the subtle energy and sink into this feeling. This energy will meditate you and heal your being. The deeper you go into meditation, the more you may be healed. Enjoy your Self!
With love,
Brian
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Sadhana
Dear Friends,
What is sadhana? Practices that lead one to the realization of the True Nature of Spirit. One can focus either on the attractions of the material world or on the attractions of Spirit. I spent most of my life trying to chase after pleasures and run away from pain. The more I focused on physical pleasures, the more I started to believe, "I am the body and mind." The more I let go of the desires for physical pleasures, the more I started to feel less bound by body and mind. Without physical addictions, the mind does not race after so many thoughts and it can just relax into being. Of course, this is a long process. The mind has millions of desires. The last thing it wants to do is stop thinking. Yet when we stop thinking, the spiritual world opens up like a flower. So many beautiful qualities of love, peace, and joy spring forth from our spiritual garden. I found it a great challenge to let go of desires until I started to feel a spark of these qualities. Then it was easy to choose the beauty of the spiritual world over addictions to the earthly world.
But at first, I needed to build faith. Some beings tap into a marvelous spirtual world so it is possible. Also I sought the connection to others who were in communion with Spirit. With their energetic support, I could more quickly start to resonate with spiritual qualities. Swami Purna has been the primary catalyst for this growth. Now sadhana has become a more natural way of life. Not so arduous. In fact, I welcome difficult times. They are doorways to further letting go of the mind's attachments of the way life should go. Challenges become the medicine I need for deepening realization of Spirit. For instance, I usually have nothing to say at a satsang so fear of the unknown arises. What if people don't like the satsang? As I let go into the unknown, the layers of fear dissolve, and words flow forth quite effortlessly. Where did they come from? Who is speaking them? This is a mystery. Everything becomes possible in this river of Grace. Let go of the sides of the river and go with the current. We are all taken care of.
Love,
Brian
What is sadhana? Practices that lead one to the realization of the True Nature of Spirit. One can focus either on the attractions of the material world or on the attractions of Spirit. I spent most of my life trying to chase after pleasures and run away from pain. The more I focused on physical pleasures, the more I started to believe, "I am the body and mind." The more I let go of the desires for physical pleasures, the more I started to feel less bound by body and mind. Without physical addictions, the mind does not race after so many thoughts and it can just relax into being. Of course, this is a long process. The mind has millions of desires. The last thing it wants to do is stop thinking. Yet when we stop thinking, the spiritual world opens up like a flower. So many beautiful qualities of love, peace, and joy spring forth from our spiritual garden. I found it a great challenge to let go of desires until I started to feel a spark of these qualities. Then it was easy to choose the beauty of the spiritual world over addictions to the earthly world.
But at first, I needed to build faith. Some beings tap into a marvelous spirtual world so it is possible. Also I sought the connection to others who were in communion with Spirit. With their energetic support, I could more quickly start to resonate with spiritual qualities. Swami Purna has been the primary catalyst for this growth. Now sadhana has become a more natural way of life. Not so arduous. In fact, I welcome difficult times. They are doorways to further letting go of the mind's attachments of the way life should go. Challenges become the medicine I need for deepening realization of Spirit. For instance, I usually have nothing to say at a satsang so fear of the unknown arises. What if people don't like the satsang? As I let go into the unknown, the layers of fear dissolve, and words flow forth quite effortlessly. Where did they come from? Who is speaking them? This is a mystery. Everything becomes possible in this river of Grace. Let go of the sides of the river and go with the current. We are all taken care of.
Love,
Brian
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